I know what I don't believe, so I suppose that is a start. I'm going to make a list of the things I don't believe.
I don't believe:
- that there is only one god
- that humanity is born bad from the start
- that all gods and goddesses are just parts of one great big god and goddess
- that all gods/goddesses are a small part of a great big "Ultimate Spirit" or something like that
- that death is the end
- that hell is a real place of torture that lasts for an eternity
- that the bible is relevant to the people of today
- that any one faith has all the answers, or is the only way or is superior to the rest
- in using magical power for negative reasons (be there hexing, cursing, whatever)
- that if people don't use bodily fluids in their spellwork that they are not a "proper" pagan/witch
- that being "fluffy" is a bad thing
- that anyone has the right to be scornful or mocking towards anothers choice of faith
The things I do believein are harder to write down, but I'll try, purely to examine them and see if I truly do believe them, or whether I'm just saying I do to please others.
I do believe:
- in some sort of afterlife... I don't think that it all ends when you die. I love the idea of the Summerlands, a place to meet all of your ancestors, rest and recuperate before choosing whether or not to be reborn and continue learning all that there is to learn.
- that all of the gods and goddesses that have ever been are still here with us, each of them is a seperate entity with their own strengths and weaknesses, and that their powers lay mainly in the strength of their followers and not with some super powerful godhead (how that works, I have no idea).
***MASSIVE U-TURN ALERT!!***
After having spent some time thinking about it (and although this entry is time stamped as quite early, this was saved as a draft and the time is now 11.18pm) I don't think I believe in any of it... any of it at all. I think I maybe an atheist, more probably a humanist... most definitely an agnostic.
I'm not sure that gods do actually exist, in fact I'm sure they don't (though if others need them or want them, that's fine)... I think, in the past, we had to find something to explain the unexplainable and gods and miracles fit the bill, so we used them. Why should powerful beings care about us? Why should they help us, guide us or pay us anymore attention than we pay to ants on the street? If they exist, they don't need us, why would they? They would have powers that we mere humans can only dream of, so why would they need a lesser species like humanity? If they don't seem to care about us, why should we care about them either?
Death is a scary subject, so we invent places to go when we do so as to not be scared anymore... it doesn't make them anymore real... it just means that we can go on kidding ourselves that this is not the end of us, that we'll see the people we love and care about again, thereby easing our sense of loss at their passing.
I think I spend far too much of my time thinking about religion and faiths and stuff that is unimportant in the long run. I was planning on lighting candles for people tonight, but what would be the point? Do I really think that it will do any good for the man that is, at this moment, dying from pneumonia? No, not in the least... it's just something that a lot of pagans say, just like christians say "I'm praying for you", and that does nothing either. All it does is make us feel better about the fact that there is sod all we can do to help... it lets people know that we are thinking of them... but really, it does no good!!
I think I am slowly coming to the conclusion that everything I've been hoping to find, and all of the things that I've for years been trying to convince myself to believe, is all... complete... and... utter... BOLLOCKS!!!
